1000 miles

Don't know why, but the phrase "I'd walk a thousand smiles, just to see you smile" has been going round and round in my head today. I don't think it's song lyrics, although i know vanessa carlton did a song called 1000 miles.

anyway
having a crap week again this week
really could do with sleeping more than i have been
i could really do with not having to deal with everything that seems to have crept up with on me
i could do with just going out for a beer tonight without worrying that i'll upset someone by not going out with them

i've got a really busy weekend ahead and i could just do without having it.
tonight...
i should be out with a girl,
but then i'm also supposed to be out with people from work as a leaving do,
but then i'm also supposed to be out at a mates engagement celebration,
and then there's this other girl who wants to go out tonight and has invited me along,
and finally another mate has said about going out for a beer as well...so i've got myself quintuple booked this evening!
tomorrow...
I've got 3 viewings in the morning for places to move into
a 30th birthday BBQ in the late afternoon/early evening
Sunday...
I've got a picnic

at the moment i don't really want to go to any of them...not 1!

sleep

it's fairly well known that i don't sleep too well from time to time, it's usually around the time when i've got things on my mind and am generally preoccupied with other stuff to think about sleep...
well i'm having a moment like that at the moment, although i'm not 100% sure why i'm having issues, i am none-the-less having issues with sleeping at the moment.
it's rare for me to get to bed before midnight at the moment, but common for me to be up around 7
and when i do get into bed, regardless of how tired i might be, i can never go to sleep straight away...which, let's face it is pretty crap!
at the moment i've been using twitter, facebook and blogger as distractions to not going to sleep, but i've all but exhausted them again at the moment, i need a new distraction!
i know some of the stuff floating in my head is stuff that i can deal with and some of the stuff is things that i can't...
the stuff i can deal with i'm trying to get on and deal with, but it's the other things that usually get to me

see i'm too tired to blog really because i'm not making much sense
bugger
night
Px

so now what...?

when life gives you lemons, you throw the fuckers back and demand a refund!!

I've had a couple of lemons over the last year, be they relationship wise, health wise, job wise...lemons are lemons

but I'm determined to makes things different and although it's a little late to be making new years resolutions, i'm going to make sure that things only get better for the remainder of the year and then on into next year

i've got to get me PMA on again...it's been a while, but it's coming back to me :)

i've missed blogging a bit, but after not doing it for over a year, it's going to take me a while to get back into the swing of it...

at the moment i'm struggling to think what i want to tell people. i think really i should catch everyone up on what has happened, but at the same time i want to just go at it with a new chapter and a clean start on it all

new start is winning out by the way

laters peeps
Px

I'm BACK

Yeah...you read that right...I'm back again

it's been over a year since I last even logged in to my blog account...can you adam and eve it?!

well I think it;s about time I got back into blogging. things have happened and stuff has changed, but Px is really still here and he wants to get things straight!

but for now it's bloody late

so I'm just going to tease you with this news of my imminent return

Laters
Px

swan song

I've not been blogging much for a while now
and although i used to blog loads
i now feel that my blog has out lasted it's usefulness, initially i used the blog to vent and keep my mind clear, but over the years as more and more people have read it i've found it harder and harder to keep things as open and real as i had initially wanted and started censoring things that i was writing. this was not what i wanted to happen with my blogs
as a result this will be my last post. and although i'm not going to close the page down or remove it for a while, there will be no more posts on my part

i'll miss it
but at the same time it's going to be a weight off my mind not having to worry that i've not posted for a long time or that i don't have anything interesting to say...

so to update you on the things i left hanging in the last post

the interview went ok
but they still offered me the job, i'm just finishing my 3rd week of working as a payroll assistant.

the hospital went ok too
although i tried to go back to work on the sunday and nearly passed out behind the bar
and i still have little or no sensation/feeling in my lower lip and jaw, which unfortunately i'm starting to get used to after 5 weeks of not having it :(

linny came over and went again and i'm missing her terribly
especially now that i've got a real job and our times are clashing more and more
although we had a great time
and there are some very funny pictures online at both her blog and on facebook of us enjoying the holiday

speaking of facebook
i'm not leaving it
but i've removed a lot of information from it
and i'm not going to be checking it or using it as much as i have in the past
i will keep an active account there so people can "find me" (not that anyone does anything once they have) and i have contact info for everyone on there
but that's all

love to you all
and i'm sorry
Pete

the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire!

we don't need no water let the m**********r burn!

ok some of you on facebook will have noted tha ti had the fire brigade out as stupid oclock on saturday morning
the story is simple
i went to bed around 2 in the morning (i usually do this because i'm still jacked from work), well just as i'm dropping off to sleep around 2.45, the smoke alarm goes off...
thing is, it wasn't my smoke alarm, it was the one belonging to the bloke downstairs...
i leave it thinking he'll turn it off shortly
after 5 minutes i think, hey that's going on a bit long, is he even there?
i have a look around my flat and out of the windows to see if there's any smoke
can't see anything or smell anything, so i head back to bed
after 15 minutes of this i'm getting a little pissed off, why hasn't the fucker turned his alarm off?
so i call the fire and police
while i'm on the phone to the police the firemen turn up, i've got to run down stairs and explain to them that although it's probably nothing, the bloke's alarm has been going of for over 20 minutes now
they poke around and have a look see if there's anything they can see and they see smoke
hanging a couple of feet off the ceiling
they bang on the door a couple of times and the bloke answers, apparently oblivious to either the smoke or the alarm!
although he was swaying a little making me htink he'd had a couple of beers

from what the firemen said, the bloke had thought it would be a good idea to get something to eat in his inebriated state. he put a pan on, some water in it and a spoon, and wandered off to sit down while the pan got to the boil.
he fell asleep
that kind of deep sleep you only get when you've had a few
and left the pan on
well the plastic handle of the spoon melted
and started smoking
which set the alarm off eventually
which kept me awake
which meant i called the fire peeps
and they sorted it out
so in a round about way i couldve saved this blokes life

has he spoken to me since?
hell no
not even a note through the letter box
dumb bastard!

anyway this week is a busy one for me
instead of the quiz on monday, me and the guys went to see a band called british sea power, it was ok, not great, but thennot really my thing to listen to
speaking of the pub, i've also bene made a duty manager, and the landlord told me that whatever i put down on an application form he'll back up as long as i tell him beforehand. the landlady then said that if they get paperwork asking for a reference they'll give me a bad one because they don't want me to leave!
tomorrow i've got an interview
a real live face to face one, with a test thing as well...yeah i must remember not to do so well on the test that they think i'll leave, but well enough to make them want to employ me!
and on friday, it's my worst day
i've got to go to the hospital to have my remaining wisdom teeth removed, which will involve bone chipping to get them out!
it does mean that i've got friday night off from the pub
and saturday too
but they want me back in time for sunday...

i've got a feeling that this might hurt though
but i'll be there...because as i keep telling people
I'M HARDCORE!!!

i've also got some money switched around at the moment for future plans
nothing more can be said at this time
but keep your eyes and ears open
news will be coming soon
i hope!

right i was going to bed half hour ago
night peeps
i might be back in the morning with a rush job HNT
we shall see though
Px

just another HNT

there's still no word on the job hunt, but i've been pulling all hours at the pub (partly because there's no-one else to do them, partly because the landlord had a heart attack last week, leaving even more hours up for grabs!)

i've done a couple more applications this week, and i had one back to say thanks, but no thanks. (at least they got in touch right?)

anyway

when i got the work on last weeks HNT started, i also had a new piercing

nothing major

nothing naughty

but it was the start of a plan

and now it looks like this

i've had a lok of comments about it

most people say it looks different and they like it

even my mum likes it!

but that's my new ring

no plans to have anything more done just yet though

laters peeps

Px

it's a HNT

you know what

since being made redundant on friday

i've hardly done anything at all

so i thought it was time that i got back to things that i should've done before

it's HNT time...

so you remember this tattoo...?

well...i've had some work done on it...so now it looks like this...

i think it looks a lot better now :)

Happy HNT peeps

Laters

Px

sorry it's been a couple of days

but i found out on monday that on friday that we're being made redundant, it was all expected to be honest, but some people have taken it as a bit of a shock. it didn't help that the new owners of the company dragged out the consultation process until the last week possible before letting people know what was going on and when the redundancies are happening.

so
as of noon tomorrow, i've got work in the pub, but that's all
but bless the landlord, he's offered me as much as possible, which is as it stands, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday and sunday evenings...leaving monday as my only night off, which is quiz night, so i'll more than likely be there anyway. but that does mean that i get to lay in every morning

anyway, seeing as i'm a little out of things at the moment, i got sent this, i may have posted something similar before, one of the guys was asking me questions the other day, then emailed me the following

Rising Sign is in 17 Degrees Capricorn
You are practical and reserved but very ambitious. An achiever and a hard worker, you respect success. Older looking and very serious as a youth, things lighten up and you relax more as you mature. You have a serious view of the world as being a difficult place to be in. Very envious of those who seem to have an easier life than you have, relaxation and play do not come easily. It is important that you had abundant parental support as a child so that you do not feel lonely and isolated as an adult. Generally, you have a good, earthy sense of humor that can carry you through when times really do get tough. You are purposeful, self-willed, industrious, realistic and responsible.

Sun is in 19 Degrees Scorpio.
Intense and complex by nature, you have extremely strong emotional reactions to most situations. Feelings are often very difficult for you to verbalize. Therefore you have a tendency to be very quiet - - to brood and think a lot. You seldom get overtly angry, but, when you do, you are furious and unforgiving. When you make an emotional commitment, it is total -- you are not attracted to superficial or casual relationships. If you are challenged, you take it as a personal affront and tend to lash out and fight back in a vengeful manner. You love mysteries and the supernatural. A good detective, you love getting to the roots of problems and you enjoy finding out what makes other people tick. You are known to be very willful, very powerful and quite tenacious!

Moon is in 21 Degrees Aries.
High-spirited and courageous, you are a fighter when your emotions are aroused. The degree of force and drive that you can bring to any effort sometimes surprises others. You have hair-trigger reactions to specific stimuli and tend to "let it all hang out." You sometimes act before you think and do things on the spur of the moment, and that sometimes gets you into trouble. Your moods change quickly -- you have quite a temper, but you don't hold grudges. Very independent, with an extremely strong and forceful personality, you are known for being impulsive, careless, reckless, foolhardy, rash and daring.

Mercury is in 11 Degrees Sagittarius.
Your mind is very curious and inquisitive, always seeking information on a wide variety of topics. The broader the subject matter (philosophy, science, religion, metaphysics), the more it will appeal to you. You prefer to deal with abstractions -- the small but important details associated with any subject tend to slip your grasp. You are known for being blunt, honest and truthful.

Venus is in 12 Degrees Scorpio.
Your feelings about others are deep, powerful, intense and complex. When you like someone, you do so totally and obsessively if you do not like someone, they do not exist. Your faithfulness and loyalty to your lover is unquestioned, indeed at times it is too much so -- you get so possessive that you almost smother your partner. At times, your feelings are kept deep within you and, because they are so complex and intense, they frighten you -- this is the way that you try to ignore them. But the more you try to do this, the more explosive things get when you eventually do express them.

Mars is in 07 Degrees Sagittarius.
Your every action is motivated by high moral standards and ideals. You will work very hard to improve the lot of the world at large, but you demand action about it -- you do not like to just sit around and talk about doing it in an abstract manner. You like to be where the real action is. You resist mightily any attempts to limit your freedom and you will assist anyone who feels put down and restricted. You are extremely restless by nature -- physical exercise is very important to you if you would maintain your health.

Jupiter is in 08 Degrees Leo.
You must be proud of all that you do in order to grow and develop. You enjoy being totally honest and aboveboard and you revel in the admiration and respect you receive from others due to your high- minded, upright way of life. Make sure, though, that your natural tendency to boast and show off is based on your actual accomplishments. Don't fall prey to self-exaggeration or arrogance. You truly do like outrageous spectacles and grand jolly times and will go out of your way to make them a reality.

Saturn is in 12 Degrees Virgo.
Your life must be orderly and practical and full of known and familiar routines in order for you to feel comfortable with yourself. Be careful, however, not to let "order" become the be-all and end-all of your life, or you may become cold, crass and unfeeling. Doing useful, practical things boosts your self- esteem. Abstract concepts and reasoning seem frivolous and a waste of time to you. You are very critical of yourself (and others), indeed at times quite self-deprecating. Try to relax a bit and allow yourself the freedom to fail once in a while. However, you probably won't fail very often because you are such a perfectionist.

Uranus is in 16 Degrees Scorpio.
You, and your peer group, demand to confront life at its deepest and most meaningful levels. Very compulsive and obsessive in your approach to everything, you will avoid anything that is casual or superficial, especially when it comes to relationships. You will seek out and explore new methods of healing as well as different ways to deal with deep-seated emotional problems.

Neptune is in 17 Degrees Sagittarius.
You, and your entire generation, are heavily involved in investigating and idealizing foreign and exotic intellectual systems and religious philosophies. The most extreme ideals will be pursued with gusto. You will be at the forefront of humanitarian attempts to improve the lot of those who are in need of assistance. You will be comfortable with the concept of the "global village."

Pluto is in 17 Degrees Libra.
For your entire generation, this is a time of radical changes in society's attitude toward marriage and interpersonal relationships. There is a general fear and awe at the power inherent in making emotional or contractual commitments -- they will not be entered into lightly.

N. Node is in 25 Degrees Virgo.
You're usually quite at ease in leaving leadership roles in the hands of others. You would rather tend to the thousand and one details that need to be accomplished to keep any group going. Although you're very fussy and high-minded when it comes to choosing your associates, once your loyalty is given you can be trusted with many of the practical aspects of any project that is being undertaken. Usually quite unselfish, you will toil long hours in the service of any worthy cause that demands your attention. But be careful that your perfectionist tendencies don't get in the way of making real progress. (In other words, don't waste your time dusting clean shelves!)

there are bits of it that i find very accurate, others are not so accurate

the sooner the better

the weather here is rubbish at the moment.
it's cold enough to snow, but it's not snowing, it's foggy and with the wind chill as well, it feels like it's -5C (or about 20F for those of you who prefer it that way)

I went out for a couple of beers last night and it was stupid cold on the walk to the pub, the walk home was ok because we'd had a couple of drinks though, but it was still bitterly cold.
but it was a good night out, in fact it was better than that, the northerner, the boag and myself went for a drink and a get together as it's been a while since we went out for one. we caught up, chatted rubbish and had a few beers. that to me is a decent night out
no stress
no pressure
no fuss
no hassle

anyway, there's another meeting to decide my future at this job next week, we should all know what's going on by the 14th at the very latest though...
still i've had a look for a couple of jobs, not many though. I was supposed to go to the second interview for the "sales and marketing" job yesterday, but i didn't go. I don't really want to go door to door asking people if they are happy with their energy suppliers and would they like to change to another one. I don't like the idea of standing around in shopping centres pushing satelite tv and personal health care solutions to people who really are not that interested and don't want to break stride to say no thanks, let alone stand and answer a couple of questions. so now i've got to have a think about what to do, but to be honest i'll have a look at a couple of places, all i need is a job to tide me over until i know what else might be happening, the bigger plans and all that...
the future is looking good

right
i'm done for today
i've got an afternoon at work and an evening working in the pub...i can't wait!
laters peeps
Px

new year, new me?

doubtful!
i mean the idea that one day is any better reason than any other day to make "life changes" is wrong. there's nothing wrong with making changes all year round, especially if they are to make you a better person...
i didn't make any resolutions, i never do, i see no point in them because i usually only end up breaking them. well except for one year when i gave up coffee, but that was cheating really because i don't drink coffee anyway...

anyway i hope everyone enjoyed the holiday season, got the presents they wanted and all that jazz...and if you didn't, i hope you all managed to change it for something you wanted in the sales :)

there are rumours that it's going to snow this week here, Linny i warned you that you'd need to get a coat, looks like it could be very cold! although at the moment, it doesn't look like it's going to happen anytime soon...

anyway i'm just rambling now...
laters peeps
Px

another year over

a quick look back over the year leads me to conclude that although i started really strong with a lot of blog posts...i've ended it really badly!
oh well, such is life i guess!
i've also had several different jobs, some good, others not so good.
i've had a holiday (the first in ages) and it was really good

next year i'm sure will mark a strong improvement in my life
i've set myself a couple of challenges, i've had a couple forced on me
and i've put things in motion that are now up to fate to decide the next step
2007 wasn't quite the year of Px that i'd hoped for, maybe 2008 will be

btw...for those who are still interested, the job front hasn't changed, i'm still possibly being made redundant. although i did have an interview and i've had the call back for it, but i'm not sure it's really a job that i can see myself doing, or even wanting to do to be honest...
anyway
here's to hoping you all have an amazing new year and celebrate it however you choose to
raise a glass for me, i'll be raising one for all of you
laters
Px

It's been how long?

ok sorry it's been so long
but there's been a lot of shit hitting some very big fans around here
but first of all
my back is finally ok :)
that's a good thing

ok some of the shit
last wednesday we were called into a meeting at work in which we were told that there were talks going on regarding another company buying out our company...they were at such an advanced stage that the directors felt that we should know about it
on thursday we were called in to another meeting to say that as of noon that day we'd been bought. some questions were asked, but there wasn't much there because everyone was a little in shock...
today we were in a 3rd meeting, this meeting was to discuss the plans for the future...in other words it was a meeting to discuss what was going to happen to all of us.
basically we were told that with the exception of the sales team, because the company was pretty much losing money, everyone was at risk of losing their jobs, from the managers right the way down the line...
and considering muggins here was the last in
guess who might be the first out!

other shit that's been going on
i have plans for my future
but in discussing these plans it became obvious that these plans were going to cost a lot more than i'd originally thought. hankfully my mum has stepped in on that front and offered my some money to help out with the plan
things there are on track
or at least they were until they took a knock again today.

i'm trying to be all about the PMA at the moment, but i'm not sure how many knocks i can take!

so, if anyone can offer me a job, that'd be sweet

laters
Px

ok ok

i know i've been slack recently
but this last week i've got an excuse

for some dumb ass reason i've screwed up my back, and i have no idea how or when i did this. but ever since sunday my back as slow progressively worsened to the point on wednesday that i had to go home from the pub because it was hurting me to stay standing up. yesterday it wasn't too bad, but today it's feeling pretty bad again
and once again i have no idea why!

so with having this messed up back, i've pretty much not done anything other than sit in my chair at work or lay in my bed at home... which understandably sucks donkey balls

i'm working again tonight at the pub and i'm hoping that tonight i can last longer than i did on wednesday, purely because i need the money
i know that my back is important and pushing it too much now will result is problems down the line, but dammit i can't help it.

i promise to be back to my usual self soon
with witty and regular posts
just as soon as i get back to normal

laters, take care peeps
Px

what happened?

the dy i turned 29 i did most things like i normally would, i went to work, i went home and i went to the pub to do the quiz

while i was at work i had a shed load of people send me messages to either my blog, my facebook account or my mobile wishing me happy birthday which was nice
so thanks to everyone for doing that :) (special thanks to linny who posted on her blog that it was my birthday)

when i went home i opened my present from my brother and my cards from the rest of the family (my bro got me season 6 of family guy although i've not had a chance to watch it yet and in the cards i got some money)
i also played on the Wii that i've borrowed from a friend of mine
i've borrowed it because he's on holiday for a month and you can not buy one for love nor money at the moment in the shops here...unless you're willing to pay more than usual for them...which i am not!

at the pub one of my oldest friends came along it's been ages since i saw him last and it was good to catch up again with him and his lady. he got me cakes for my birthday secretly hoping that i wouldn't like them because he does!
the quiz itself my team thought it would be funny to change our usual name to "the nearly 30's" amongst other "humourous" names that took the micheal out of me being nearly 30 now
but we won beer and wine by the end of the night
so it was all good
also the bloke who runs the quiz got the whole pub to sing happy birthday!

and that was the day that was
i enjoyed the non celebration of my non birthday a lot
next year i'm 30
and although i'm not planning a party
i am thinking about where i'll be for it

laters peeps
Px

29

today I'm 29
it's not a big deal to me
maybe it should be
it's my last year of being in my 20's

next year i'm supposed to grow up
yeah right
like that's going to happen!

anyway this is just a little post for anyone who wants to wish me a happy birthday to do so :)

but if you have the time
i'd like you to read the next post down too
it's important to me
Px

rememberence sunday

maybe it's a big thing
maybe it's not

but today was rememberence sunday

a day when in the UK we remember everyone who fought in the wars
not just the world wars, but every conflict since as well

usually this doesn't mean much to me
but today there was something that happened that brought it home a little

one of the locals who comes in most sunday lunch times for a few pints was in today
he used to be in the army and he had his colours on in his tie and beret
he wore his medals
and his poppy

he's 27

what really struck me
and a lot of people in the pub this evening though was something that i'd never expected

when i arrived back at work this evening there were 2 pints sat on the bar, next to one of the pumps
i was asked if i could make sure that they stayed there
on the bar
all night

this local had lost two of his friends in combat
he bought a round for them

this confused some of the younger members of staff
i had to explain that it was his wish and not a waste of beer
it was his wish to pay them respect in this way

a couple of the locals got confused by these two pints on the bar
until they had it explained to them
then they realised the significance

the landlady was caught up in the emotion of it when i told her why they were there
it brought tears to her eyes

it struck a chord with me too

I know it's late now
but i hope everyone reading this
regardless of nationality
regardless of the time
i hope everyone takes a moment
and remembers

"Lest We Forget"

Px

Georgia pics

for those of you who don't have facebook...where i put up 50ish of the pics from my trip

here's a few for you...

Atlanta

OK i know i've been rubbish at posting about my holiday
but with good reason

my holiday was a break for me
away from my life as it is
so, that means away from work
away from home
away from the pub
and away from here

now as much as i love you all
it was my holiday
and as such i want to keep it that way
i'll share with you some photo's (hopefully later today) but that's probably all you're getting

i know it's a bit cagey of me, but that's how i want to keep it

and before minds go into overdrive
it's not because there was anything salacious was going on
i know what you're all like

laters peeps
Px

my birthday

My birthday is a week today
and I don't want to do anything for it
I don't really celebrate my birthday, it's just another day to be honestand seeing as it's a Monday this year, I shall be mostly spending it at the pub quiz because that's just how exciting it really is

29 is a bit of a non-birthday anyway